Me: maybe I’m not cut out to be a writer…idk what if I’m not good enough
BookTok romance writers: ‘what if you were just a normal school teacher…but the MINOTAUR wanted to get you PREGNANT’
Simon Riley versus the teddy you sleep with
It's an old, ratty thing, something you've had for years and has always found its way into the crook of your elbow as you slept
when you first started dating Simon, you hid it away from him on the nights he stayed at yours until one day he walked into your room and saw it on the pillows
"what the fuck is that?"
"not what, who" you glared at him and he raised an eyebrow back
after then, this teddy became his enemy. sometimes he places it high up on your wardrobe when he made the bed, other times he flung it from the bed while you slept only for you to wake up like the soft thud was a blaring alarm as you half crawled from bed to find it
and when he wakes up and finds you not curled against him, his eyes opening and he turns in search of you only to find you on the other side of the bed and holding your teddy against your chest... he glares at the teddy like it's smiling back at him
every poll on this site for the next three days
after hours of scientific research I’ve come to the conclusion that scar is slowly shrinking down to the size of a vex. will update as situation develops
DP x DC: Wait... this isn’t a gay bar??
I was just thinking about Danny as a bartender at a rogues bar and then it struck me...
Danny thinks he works at a gay bar
Why? Well, have you looked at the clients? Bisexual queen Harley Quinn, lesbian icon Poison Ivy, Two Face is clearly bi(two)sexual and has a thing with Bruce Wayne, Scarecrow is probably ace or maybe aro, Riddler is at the very least homo romantic, hell, even if Red hood comes by he’s bi/pan AND poly
What I’m saying is, based off the clientele, Danny would think he works at a gay bar
and based on the evidence they have a hard time disagreeing with him
#dpxdc#dp x dc crossover#dp x dc prompt#dp x dc#dp x dc crack#bartender danny#danny thinks he works in a gay bar#BECAUSE LET'S FACE IT#half the regular batman rogues are pretty fruity#and so are the Bats frankly#haha 'Fruit Bats'#Dick is probably bi but I like to imagine him as somehow the only straight person in the Batfamily because I find it hilarious
Alfred comes home and there's a whole noise from the kitchen.
Alfred: Is everything okay?
Damian: Dumbass is coming out.
Alfred: Oh.
Alfred (to Dick): ...I figured this day would come sooner or later...
Dick:
Alfred: Don't think I didn't saw it my boy, and pardon me if I should said something before...
Dick: No, no, no it's not
Alfred:... I mean It was obvious from the start but I figured I shouldn't press-
Dick: Alfie It's not
Jason: No, no let him finish.
----
Batman: Yes, my kid also came out to me recently.
Superman (to Dick): Oh wow, that's great! I'm proud of you buddy.
Dick:
Dick: What
Tim: It's me.
Superman: Oh
Superman: Oh wow, thats great! I'm proud of you buddy.
Dick: No, wait you can't just-
----
Jon: I'm just glad in not being alone in this, you know.
Titans:
Dick: It's not me.
Titans: "Oh, right. Sure." " Yeah we knew it" "Totally"
#I've been thinking about this since Tim came out beaceus that was pretty much every reaction from everyone I know#And i find fucking hilarious#Tim had more in lore logic but Grayson just screams queer energy and there's no way people around him didn't caught up onto that#jason todd#tim drake#dick grayson#batfam#incorrect quotes#batfamily incorrect quotes#the funniest part is that if gotham knights is cannon he might actually be and this is just him being confused#on how people think he'll need to come out#but if he's not he's the talk Valentina of the family and we love him anyway
sometimes I think of all the on-the-surface warm, well-meaning but deeply ineffectual advice and attention john gives harrow through harrow the ninth (make some soup and get some sleep! get a hobby! don't be so hard on yourself! self care harrow! as long as I need take no actual responsibility in this relationship whatsoever I would have loved to be your dad!) set up against the stark truth that with his other hand he has been staging her attempted horrific murder again and again and again like a living nightmare on the logic that it will 'put her down or fix her'. and then I find that I wish there is a hell. a special hell where twitch streamers turned necromantic death emperors go
#the locked tomb#harrowhark nonagesimus#john gaius#harrow the ninth#this is why I don't buy john as misunderstood and initially well-meaning AT ALL#this is a pattern you see with him again and again and again -- right down to his interpersonal relationships#(and indeed it's in the more grounded interpersonal relationships you can most clearly see him as he is I think#the fantasy death empire of a thousand years doesn't register quite as viscerally because it's like. heightened; not quite real#but the emotional violence and manipulation that surrounds him? oh boy that is EXTREMELY real and scarily well-observed)#there's a premeditation to so much of what he does (contracts with planets that only end 'in the event of the emperor's death' anyone?#yeah john we get it you're hilarious and I wish you weren't)#the greatest trick john ever pulled was making anyone think he's just a lil guy. what does he know he's only god#when you first read the book the complete callousness of the other adults is so horrible that john seems like an oasis of care#(though you start to get this uneasy feeling when that care never seems to translate to like... relief or soothing or resolution)#and it makes it feel almost obscene when you find out what's actually going on#it's the mercy & augustine enabler hour but at least they're completely honest in their cruelty there#while john is -- well he sure is being john huh#this is just me being angry with him btw philosophically I don't think this is how the story will or should end#(with john slam dunked right into hell that is)#it's just... harrow is so vulnerable. and what he does to her is so insidious and fucked up#john is very deeply human. unfortunately the capacity to quite simply suck so much is deeply human too
Presenting: King Sidon, his wife Queen Yona and his boyfriend Link.
Yona is very supportive of everything except Sidon forgetting his ceremony cues.
(I had an atrocious week and TotK has been coming in clutch for keeping me sane.)
#totk spoilers#loz totk#sidlink#link x sidon#totk yona#totk link#totk sidon#tears of the kingdom#I love Yona I adore her design oh my god#If I were to create a Zelda-sona it'd basically just be her with different clothes so I'm contractually obligated to love her#But Nintendo trying to give Sidon a case of the not-gays with her is hilarious#The man greets his fiancée like a coworker and then turns around to explode with adoration over Link in the same breath#This is either a Lavender Marriage or a case of 'every royal Zora finds Link irresistible'. I like both but prefer the former#Like. Yona meets Zelda once things are settled and gets all flustered and tongue tied#and neither Sidon or Link have any idea what's going on because they share 1 braincell#which is used exclusively for fighting really good#sharky art#zelda comic
The Boiling rock in a nutshell
Y'know, this was supposed to be posted next week but I've decided that gay month deserves to start out a lil fruity
this is basically what happened, right?
(these guys are very lucky that everyone at NRC 1) has the combined intelligence of a sack of bricks, and 2) is easily distracted by shiny things.)
#art#twisted wonderland#twisted wonderland spoilers#stage in playful land#stage in playfulland#these two are SO sleazy and i am utterly delighted by them#can't wait to find out their tragic backstory in approximately 3-4 weeks!#fortunately i have like a month to figure out how the heck to draw their hair (spoiler: i will never figure it out)#also. god. i love it whenever leona accidentally reveals his Mom Side.#he doesn't care about any of this but he WILL be tagging along to make sure no one else gets into trouble#once again he has to be the Responsible Adult and he hates it. the whimsical hat weighs heavy upon his head.#anyway this is me so excuse me while i now talk about diasomnia for three hours#but lilia being all 'kids gotta have some adventure in their lives!' is hilarious#specifically because you know silver would NEVER.#100% silver not only never snuck out but he always went to bed on time AND brushed his teeth AND flossed even when nobody made him.#lilia: aww but you should be enjoying your youth! >:c#silver: i am. i enjoy being respectful and disciplined and honoring you as my father.#lilia:#lilia: maybe i'm TOO good at raising kids#you know i was going to say none of his kids would be involved in this but i actually think malleus definitely would#he would not see it as a moral quandry though. he would just be excited to be invited along.#(the only reason he isn't there is because he was busy admiring a termite-infested beam somewhere and yuu didn't get a chance to ask him)#i mean MAYBE if lilia as his single authority figure told him no then he would have some reservations#but lilia's the one who's screaming HELL YEAH LET'S SNEAK OUT AND DEFY AUTHORITY while dabbing so moot point there#sebek would never and he would rat on everyone else. unless malleus is going in which case he's already there.#and i guess if everyone else is going silver probably would too#but he'd. y'know. feel conflicted about it.
Artober day 3!
#artober 2023#inktober#minato namikaze#kakashi hatake#namikaze minato#hatake kakashi#naruto shippuden#naruto#artists on tumblr#digital art#koko draws#I find the idea of a 15 yo baby jounin training a 5 yo baby genin absolutely hilarious#people probably though Minato was the one taking the chunin exams instead of Kakashi LOL#I know this was retconned like 95% of the cool things about part 1 naruto#you can pry them from my cold dead hands though ~
Amongst the crowds. He's two seconds away from a breakdown if you're interested.
lore accurate chuuya canonically drives a 2006 sparkly barbie motorcycle
#for the love of god someone pls take away my artist privileges#this came to me in a fever dream except i wasn't actually sick just delusional#the pink leather jacket was a gift from kouyou for his sixteenth birthday and he's obliged to wear it everytime he takes the motorcycle out#dazai finds it absolutely fucking hilarious and probably takes blackmail photos except you can't blackmail a bad bitch like chuuya so#every time you open his photos he's probably the only one getting embarrassed bc it's all pics of his partner👹#anyway he looks so bbygirl in pink i wish he changed his outfit for smth other than official art#but alas#bungou stray dogs#bungo stray dogs#nakahara chuuya#chuuya nakahara#lotus draws
Anonymous asked:
What do you think of Rook's savanaclaw card? <333
I didn't get him (and I need to save my keys for Silver's birthday, sob) so I looked up his groovy, and I'm not over how incredibly dramatic and epic and cool it looks in direct contrast to the absolutely ridiculous context. just look at that dynamic action and his majestic sparkling tears and keep in mind that this is pretty much right after a bunch of characters have been dance battling for his soul.
and then even the actual moment of the groovy is just like
this is NOT a negative in the slightest, I love it all, this truly was an incredible update in so many ways
#art#twisted wonderland#twisted wonderland spoilers#twisted wonderland episode 7 spoilers#twisted wonderland book 7 spoilers#twisted wonderland episode 7 part 8 spoilers#twisted wonderland book 7 part 8 spoilers#to be fair it's not COMPLETELY wacky there is actual drama going on#but that's inbetween rook's dream-vil and neige being totally hilarious at each other#'i shan't let you hurt this beautiful child!' 'vil no! if they were to harm your beauty i would be crushed by sorrow!' <- actual dialogue#also neige seeing vil as a mother figure. it's WONDERFUL and i hope real-vil never finds out because this would kill him#just like he killed neige multiple times in his own dream! :)#there was so much wild stuff in this update and not in the least was that the second time vil realized he was in a dream#his reaction was to KILL EVERYONE and cackle maniacally about it#god forbid a queen do anything i guess#anyway i also love the contrast between what i assumed savanarook would be like and what he was actually like#'he looks so wild...what kind of dangerous dream will this mighty hunter have...'#oh no he's actually just an adorable movie geek who is SO EXCITED to share his hyperfixation with us#somehow less intimidating than regular rook#and yet still a delightful little freak. his BEDROOM#the background artist went SO ham on it. truly the magnum opus of twst backgrounds#there are a bunch of little details it is SO worth zooming in on#(including a tiny little picture of che'nya! which...actually i think that implies rook may have stolen an rsa yearbook or something)#(that's our rook! /sitcom laugh track)
